Transcript:Quids Game
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Transcript for | |
Quids Game | |
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Written by | Cody Ziglar |
Transcribed by | Jasonbres |
- [Opening Credits. Caption: Proven to Promote Brain Growth in Inanimate Objects]
- [Scene: Outer space. The Planet Express Ship is flying to an unknown destination. Cut to inside the ship. Leela and Bender are at their usual spots. Fry walks in carrying a package with the label "Urgent Delivery: No Backsies."]
Leela: I'm surprised you didn't call in sick this morning, Fry. Isn't it a special day?
Fry: No, just my birthday. All I want is to enjoy the quiet desolation of space for a few peaceful hours.
- [All of a sudden, the rest of the Planet Express crew jump out.]
Crew: Surprise!
- [The urgent delivery box opens up to reveal a birthday cake, complete with already lit candles.]
Fry: Uh, 'kay. This really wasn't…
- [Sal and Hattie appear behind him.]
Sal: Happys birthdays!
Hattie: Happy whatchacallit!
- [Leela's parents pop out from under the ship.]
- [Bubblegum Tate spacewalks while dribbling on the windshield.]
Bubblegum: Happy B-day, Fry.
Fry: Jeez. How many people did you invite?
Leela: Only a few... less than 40.
- [More people come out of hiding, including Randy, Dr. Cahill, Kif, Barbados Slim, Vyolet, the Wongs, and the Cygnoids.]
All: Surprise!
- [Zapp slides in from under between Fry's legs.]
Zapp: Surprise, sailor!
Fry: [sighs, sadly] Thanks, everyone.
Elzar: What's the matter, Fry? You look sick and so darn blue.
Hyperchicken: Chicken cordon bleu!? B'kaw!
Fry: I don't wanna talk about it.
- [Fry turns to the windshield and sobs]
Smitty: [through megaphone] Attention, party people. We got a code 99. Birthday boy unresponsive.
URL: We need backup. So, I'mma turn the music back up.
- [URL inserts a cassette tape into his mouth and a disco ball comes out of his head and his teeth become colored lights. Dance music plays as everyone dances. Petunia accidentally backs into Fry, splatting the cake in his face.]
Fry: Hey! Please, just…
- [A thud is heard, and everyone begins to panic as they fall to the ground and the music stops and the lights turn back on.]
Leela: Emergency! All butts to battle cushions!
- [Cut to outside as the ship appears to be pulled in the direction of a dusty desolate planet.]
Leela: We're being pulled off-course by some huge gravitational force! A black hole!
Scruffy: [raising his hand] Scruffy begs to differ. I see it as more of a gray-brown, or perhaps toasted umber.
Leela: Impact in three! I mean, one!
- [The ship crash lands onto the planet.]
Blek: Is everybody okay? 'Cause I'm not.
[Scene: The planet. The door of the ship opens, and the group begins to exit.]
Fry: Coming out! [trips and falls] Ow!
:[He spits out some dirt. Some of his saliva drops onto the surface, causing a blue energy field to fill the planet and turn it bright white.]
Leela: We heard a girlish scream. Are you okay?
Fry: Did anyone else see that?
Dr. Cahill: [carrying Sal] No. I was busy making a tourniquet out of my tiny, tiny shirt.
Farnsworth: What kind of hellhole has Leela brought us to this time?
Randy: A barren wasteland devoid of life. Like Fire Island after Labor Day. There's literally nothing here. Except that tasteless suburban teardown.
Fry: [gasps] That's the tasteless suburban teardown I grew up in!
[Scene: Inside the house. Everyone walks in, and the inside indeed resembles Fry's old house.]
Fry: Whoa, weird. I was just repressing a memory of this. It's set up exactly like my eighth birthday party. The theme was Game Night Afternoon.
- [Flashback: 1982. Mrs. Fry is pouring some Iowan Punch into a Game Night party cup. Yancy Sr. approaches young Fry who is moping on the stairwell.]
Yancy Fry, Sr.: What's wrong, son? Worried about our boys in Grenada?
Young Fry: No. It's just I-I'm not very good at games, Dad. I don't wanna lose on my birthday.
Yancy Fry, Sr.: Oh, don't worry. Not everything in life is about winning. But most things are. Almost everything.
- [A knock at the door is heard. Mrs. Fry opens it and many of Fry's friends enter.]
Friends: Whoa! Happy birthday!
Gedgie: Here's Josh Gedgie! High five, best bud!
- [They attempt to high five but slap each other on the cheek.]
Fry: Oh! So close!
[They both laugh.]
[Scene: Back to the present. Everyone is gathered in the dining room.]
Fry: I can't believe it. Everything is exactly how it was, right down to the two-liter bottle of Dr. Peeper.
Leo: What kind of weirdos would go to the trouble of recreating a low-budget store brand birthday party?
Ominous voice: It was we!
- [A floating balcony containing three pink aliens with big heads and wearing masks descends through the ceiling, the Gamesters. Everyone gasps.]
Gamester 2: He meant us. It was us!
Gamester 3: I don't know. I thought "we" sounded better.
Fry: Look, never mind the grammar. How did you bigheads get my old house here?
Sal: I'ds likes to hears about the grammars.
Gamester 2: Recreating Fry's house was mere child's play, thanks to the power of our machine. Behold! [He holds out a box with a button on it.] It scours the minds of visitors for powerful memories of conflict.
Gamester 3: And recreates those conflicts in every detail!
Gamester 1: Today, we shall reenact Philip J. Fry's 8th birthday party, including all the thrilling children's games he played!
Leela's Grandmother: I do enjoy Twister.
Fry: No Twister! You wouldn't believe what the mean kids used to twist.
Gamester 1: Then, we shall begin with the classic yet copyright-free game, Barrel of Primates!
- [Flashback: Mrs. Fry holds up a Barrel of Primates.]
Mrs. Fry: Who's ready to link monkey parts?
Friends: I am! Me!
Gedgie: They call me Monkey Breath for a reason.
Mrs. Fry: Longest chain wins. Players, start your chains!
- [Fry begins making a chain with three monkeys.]
- [Scene: Back to the present.]
Gamester 1: You shall play as two traditional teams of 17!
Gamester 2: Only instead of boring plastic pieces, you shall be the primates.
- [Suddenly, the party is standing on two platforms in front of a giant red and giant blue barrel. The Planet Express crew, Petunia, Zapp, LaBarbara, Kif, Hattie, the Wongs, the Hyperchicken, Slim, and Abner Doubledeal make up the red team. Scruffy, Sal, Randy, Vyolet, Gypsy-bot, Bubblegum, Dr. Cahill, the Cygnoids, the Wongs, Leg Mutant, Smitty, URL, Elzar, and Mrs. Astor make up the blue team.]
Gamester 2: Kindly enter the barrels when ready.
- [He pushes the button and the platforms collapse making everyone fall into their respective barrel.]
Vyolet: I'm ready now. [snorts]
- [Two hanging bars descend from the ceiling.]
Gamester 3: Let the game begin!
Fry: Uh, okay. We should probably obey the heads.
- [Leela holds on to Fry and Slim follows.]
Leela: [giggling] This is kind of fun.
- [Cut to the blue barrel. Bubblegum takes the bar, followed by Leg Mutant.]
Bubblegum: Dang. You must work out a lot.
Leg Mutant: I'm a leg. Every day is leg day.
- [The bars lift up as everyone makes their chain.]
Fry: I don't remember this being so hard when I was 8. Oh…
Gamester 1: Did we mention there's a twist?
Zoidberg: I knew you were twist guys!
- [Gamester 2 pushes the button and the floor opens up revealing a green pool and several skeletons.]
Morris: Oh, great. A pool of acid?
Gamester 1: No. We're not monsters!
Gamester 3: It's actually a highly alkaline liquid. That's the twist! It'll dissolve you twice as fast as acid!
Munda: But I have a fear of dissolving! How do we get down from here?
Gamester 3: By falling, of course.
- [Everyone gasps.]
Gamester 3: For in another twist, these party games shall be… to the death!
Inez: Although we kinda guessed that from the bones.
- [Flashback: Young Fry and Gedgie continue making their chains.]
Yancy Fry, Sr.: [holding a fork like a microphone] Ooh, and it's a real barn-burner! Phil's the sentimental favorite, but the smart money's on four-eyes.
Gedgie: The name's Gedgie, and it may look close, but I've got the Gedge.
- [The kids gasp as Fry adds another primate to his chain.]
Kid 1: Fry's still in it! Ah-choo!
Yancy: Look at him hook!
Gedgie: Impressive, but my superior dexterity will… [He stumbles and falls as his chain breaks.]
Young Fry: I… w-won at something? I hope my grandma's proud of me down in Hell.
Gedgie: [sighs] Nice job, Phil, but I'll Gedge you next time. [laughs]
Young Fry: [giggling] That never gets old.
- [Scene: The present. Everyone is still hanging from their chains over the alkaline pool.]
Hyperchicken: I say, I say, I don't know how much longer these old hollow bird bones can hold out.
Doubledeal: Why did you monsters dream this up? And are the streaming rights available?
Gamester 1: Our motivations are three. Mine is to gain knowledge by making people crash on our planet and subjecting them to bizarre experiments!
Gamester 2: As for me, I don't have any motivations.
Gamester 3: And I have two motivations! Gambling, and making these cool masks. Let the gambling begin!
Gamester 1: Fifty quids on the red team.
Gamester 3: A hundred quids on blue!
Hermes: [gasps] Listen up, people! If we're going to survive, we all need to work together!
Bender: Or we can shake the other team's bar and make those losers fall first!
Petunia: I vote for the shakin' thing.
- [Bender stretches his leg and begins to shake the blue team's bar.]
Fry: Cut it out, Bender! Cheating is against the rules!
Gamester 2: There are no rules. Oh, wait. Here are the rules. It just says, "Fun for ages 3 to 99."
Farnsworth: No wonder I'm not enjoying it!
Bubblegum: [writes a calculation upside-down with his pencil onto the bar] Now, hold on a minute. Accordin' to the laws of calculus, we might just be able to link chains to form a stable structure known as a catenary.
- [Bubblegum's arm comes off the rest of his body and the blue team falls.]
Bubblegum: Damn! My dribbling and differentiating arm!
- [Everyone on the blue team screams as they fall into the pool.]
Leg Mutant: Ah!
Gypsy: Is okay. Is only water. Just as I foresaw. [Her body begins to dissolve into her basic components, contradicting her statement.] Oh. Oh, wait.
- [Everyone in the pool gets dissolved down to skeletons. and the floor closes, trapping the corpses inside as the red team is lowered into their barrel.]
Amy: [sobbing] That game was not fun!
Gamester 2: Congratulations to the red team! I'm sure you'll all want to celebrate with some birthday cake.
Leela: [sobbing] My parents and my grandmother a-are dead!
Zoidberg: I'm so sorry for your loss, Leela. Can I have their cake?
- [Scene: The kitchen. Everyone is still traumatized by the events, including Zapp, who is sucking his thumb in the corner. A table rolls in carrying a birthday cake with candles shaped like the remaining players.]
Inez: Where'd you get the snazzy candles?
Gamester 2: Our machine made them!
Inez: Oh, right, right.
- [The Gamesters turn off the lights as the first Gamester lights the candles.]
Gamester 1: The next game is a simple one. Fry must blow out all the candles in a single breath.
Fry: I can do that.
Gamester 1: But, there's a twist.
Doubledeal: I like a good twist. That's what keeps the audience watching.
Gamester 1: For each candle Fry doesn't blow out, the corresponding player will die!
Doubledeal: W-Wait, what, what, what?
Fry: Don't worry, guys. I'm actually, like, really good at this. [He inhales]
- [Flashback: Young Fry is preparing to blow out the candles on his cake, which is shaped like a sports jersey with his name and the number eight on it.]
Gedgie: [scoffs] That's a lot of candles, old man. You'll never do it.
- [Fry blows out seven of his candles and begins to turn red. His blowing splats some of the cake onto Gedgie. He finally blows out the last candle. The kids cheer.]
Yancy: Good going, brother!
- [Scene: Back to the present. Fry is blowing out the candles.]
Bender: Come on, gas bag! Blow your face off!
Hermes: No fair! I got about 12 wicks!
- [Fry manages to blow out all the candles except the one shaped like Zoidberg]
Zoidberg: Uh… look! [turns to the Gamesters] He's still blowing somehow! It's going out!
- [Zoidberg attempts to snip the wick on his candle, but ends up catching fire, whooping.]
Zoidberg: My only regret is not getting any cake!
- [Zoidberg burns to ashes.]
- [Scene: The basement. The box is now a crank playing "Pop Goes the Weasel". Pan down to the remaining players playing musical chairs around a giant jack-in-the-box.]
- [Flashback: Fry's basement. Fry is seated in the only chair, but the only ones smiling are Yancy, Fry, and his parents.]
Yancy Fry, Sr.: And the winner of the Tri-State Musical Chairs Championship is Philip J. Fry! Yay!
- [Scene: Back in the present. The music continues as the players keep walking around the chairs.]
LaBarbara: [groans] It's been six hours. Can't you at least play something a little catchier?
Gamester 1: No. We have one song, and we really like it.
- [The music begins to slow down to a halt as everyone stops walking.]
Zapp: Oh, breadcrumbs.
Leela: Nobody panic! Two to a seat!
Bender: You heard her! Start panicking! Ah!
- [Chaos erupts. Hattie punches Zapp, Doubledeal kicks the Professor, Slim limbos under Hermes, Zapp and Hattie both step on Kif, and Inez punches Amy.]
Amy: Ow! Mom!
- [The chairs begin levitating. Doubledeal, Petunia, Zapp and the Hyperchicken are not seated.]
Hyperchicken: Ah! B'kaw!
- [The jack-in-the-box finally opens and a giant gruesome weasel pops out. Gamester 3 hands Gamester 1 some money. We cut to the weasel overlooking the shredded remains of the eliminated players. He burps out the Hyperchicken's beak, Petunia's earrings and wig, and Doubledeal's cigar. The remaining players all shiver with fear.]
Gamester 2: Who likes piñatas?
- [Flashback: Outside the Frys' house. A piñata shaped like an elephant is hung from a tree. One of the kids attempts to swing at it, but falls over backwards.]
Young Fry: Good try, Bartholomew.
Bartholomew: No, it wasn't.
- [Gedgie takes a turn swinging at it, but has no success.]
Gedgie: It's impossible! It'd take all three Hulks to break that. Incredible, She, and Hogan.
- [Fry gets his turn, cracks the piñata open and the candy comes pouring out.]
Young Fry: That's the first time I ever swung a bat and hit something!
- [Scene: The present. The remaining players and the gamesters are outside. The second gamester pushes the button and a giant glass piñata descends.]
Gamester 2: Since no one likes candy, we have filled our piñata with quids!
Leo: I like candy.
- [Leo gets squished by a giant Squooshie Roll.]
Inez: [wails] My husband is dead! I can't go on!
Gamester 2: Okay.
- [He pushes the button and Inez is crushed by a falling sofa.]
Blek's wife: That wasn't candy.
Leela: I didn't realize you were still alive.
- [The Cygnoid is crushed by a falling bass fiddle.]
Gamester 3: Less yakking, more whacking!
- [The remaining players all try to whack at the piñata with their sticks, but it is too high.]
Farnsworth: Oh! Ow…
Fry: Guys, I'm good at this. The secret is backswing…
- [Fry's stick hits the Professor.]
Farnsworth: Ouch!
Fry: …and follow-through.
- [Fry takes another swing and slices Farnsworth in half.]
Fry: Whoop. Sorry.
- [Barbados Slim takes a swing and cracks it open.]
Slim: I'm rich! Finally, I can give up limbo and start a professional sex league.
- [The piñata drops down and comes to life. It grabs Slim with its trunk and swallows him]
Slim: [grunts] Ah, hey, mon!
LaBarbara: Oh no! My side piece!
- [Scene: The remaining players and Gamesters are back inside the house.]
Gamester 3: And now for the penultimate game!
Kif: And then it will be over? Th-This is the last game?
Gamester 3: Penultimate means next to last. You lose the vocabulary game!
- [The second Gamester pushes the button. Suddenly, Kif is standing under a giant dictionary, which closes on him squishing him to death.]
Amy: Kiffy! No! [She sobs attempting to savor some of Kif's remaining goo.]
Gamester 1: This fiendish game will be a treasure hunt for these orbs of horsehide!
Leela: Blernsballs?
Fry: No, baseballs. My mom had balls signed by her favorite members of the 1962 Mets. She hid them all over the house, and we had to find them.
Gamester 1: There are seven of you, but only four hidden baseballs! That's all we had. And the machine can't make baseballs. It's not magic, for God's sake.
Gamester 3: Let the hunt begin!
- [Flashback: The kitchen. The kids are searching for the hidden baseballs. The sneezing kid finds one signed by Casey Stengel.]
Kid 1: [gasps] I found a baseball in the moldy tangerines! Ah-choo! Ah-choo!
Mrs. Fry: One ball left, kids! And it's the grand prize, signed by Choo-Choo Coleman himself.
Gedgie: It's as good as Gedgie's.
- [Gedgie searches the fridge but finds nothing but off-brand food products and fruit. Fry searches the football helmet-shaped cookie jar and then walks towards the fridge.]
Gedgie: Don't bother. I already checked the fridge.
Young Fry: Yeah, but things get lost in there. Just last night, we had bicentennial meatloaf. Red, white, and green.
- [Fry looks in the fridge, and finds it between the C-Train Chardonnay and the jug of Iowan Punch.]
Young Fry: A-ha!
Yancy: Way to go, Phil!
Yancy Fry, Sr.: That's my boy!
Gedgie: B-B-But, I searched every inch of that fridge. Fry must be cheating!
Kid 1: That would explain why he's winning everything.
Young Fry: I am not a cheater! I'm not!
- [Scene: The present. The remaining players are looking in the kitchen with fear.]
Leela: [through tears] Come on, Fry. This was your house. Please tell me where the baseballs are.
Fry: You want me to cheat? I can't do that, Leela. I am not a cheater. I'm not.
LaBarbara: Ooh, lookie-see what I found in the crawlspace! Signed by both Bob Millers!
Leela: [gasps] There's only one left!
- [Leela takes a folding chair and hits it at a wall, breaking it.]
Leela: Please, Fry! I know you don't wanna cheat, but it's me. Leela! The woman you occasionally say you love.
Fry: I always love you, Leela, but there are two things I just can't do: almost anything, and cheat.
Leela: You're right. You're sticking to your principles. [sniffles] I'm proud of you. [wailing, sobbing]
Fry: I've never cheated in my life. Never. But I'll do it. This once.
- [Fry opens the fridge and shows Leela the Choo-Choo Coleman ball.]
Gamester 1: Well, he cheated. You win that bet.
Gamester 3: Time to celebrate with a new mask!
- [He takes off his mask and replaces it with a similar-looking mask with red fringes on it.]
Fry: [sniffles] Please remember me as a guy who never, ever cheated. Until now.
- [Leela kisses Fry on the cheek.]
Gamester 2: As the last orb has been found, the hunt is over. Winners, step forward.
- [Amy, Hermes, LaBarbara, and Leela, who found the balls, step forward.]
Gamester 2: You're not the winners. Who said you were the winners?
Gamester 1: I forgot to mention the winners are the ones who don't find the baseballs! That's on me, guys.
- [He pushes the button and Amy, Hermes, LaBarbara and Leela spontaneously combust. Fry drops to the ground and sobs loudly.]
Bender: Ooh. That was some impressive reverse cheating, Fry.
Fry: For the last time, I'm not a cheater. Just shut up, Gedgie. I-I mean, Bendy.
Bender: [gasps, rolling up his metallic sleeves] How dare you mangle my blessed name!
Gamester 2: Whoa, whoa! Save it for the finale. A game which will be played… to the death!
Fry: They were all to the death!
Gamester 3: The final game shall be a test of raw physical prowess! Prepare yourselves for a brutal, no-holds-barred match of… [He pushes the button, revealing…] Pin the Tail on the Donkey!
Hattie: Aw, he's a cute little whatchacallit.
[A giant fanged donkey dressed in armor emerges from the wall.]
Hattie: Donkey.
Gamester 1: The beast is clad in armor, save for this tiny area on its rear.
Gamester 2: It is the donkey's Achilles butt. All its vital organs are clustered there.
Bender: Just like me! [he taps his ass twice]
Gamester 1: Simply pin the tail on the butt to slay the donkey and claim victory.
Gamester 3: I'm shivering with excitement because this game involves… masks!
- [He pushes the button, and all three players are blindfolded.]
- [Flashback: Yancy Sr. is spinning a blindfolded Gedgie around.]
Yancy Fry, Sr.: Phil, Semitic kid, it's down to you two.
Kid 3: Yes!
Kid 1: Go, Gedgie!
- [Gedgie pins the tail on the outer ring of the bullseye.]
Kid 3: Woo-hoo!
Gedgie: Yes! Everything's comin' up Gedgie. Beat that, REO Cheatwagon.
- [Fry's father spins his son around, and he goes toward the picture.]
Young Fry: [whispers] How's this for cheating?
- [Young Fry walks in the other direction.]
Kid 1: W-w-watch out!
Yancy: Watch it, Phil!
- [Young Fry pins it onto something.]
Young Fry: [taking off his blindfold] Oh, well. I guess you can't win 'em… [He is shocked to see that he successfully pinned it on the bullseye.] all?
Yancy Fry, Sr.: Look at my boy! You stabbed that donkey like a professional donkey stabber!
- [Fry's father hands him a trophy.]
Mrs. Fry: I'm so proud of you. We'll go get your presents, so you can open them.
Kid 4: Aw!
Kid 3: This party sucks!
Kid 1: Told you Fry was a cheater.
Gedgie: Happy birthday, Fry. I hope you had fun cheating 'cause nobody else did!
- [Gedgie opens the door and the other guests storm out so that he can go last and slam it.]
Young Fry: [crying] But I didn't cheat!
- [Scene: Back in the present. Fry takes off his blindfold.]
Fry: I lost a best friend a long time ago 'cause he thought I was cheating, and I'm not gonna let it happen again.
Hattie: I don't wanna lose you either, Fry.
Fry: So I'm gonna prove I'm not cheating. Gouge out my eyes!
Bender: Good idea!
Gamester 2: Fry's suggestion is beyond horrific. Therefore, we shall do it!
Gamester 3: But, to make the game fair, we shall remove the eyes of all the players!
Bender: Wait, hold on. What, what?
Gamester 1: Fear not. Our machine can remove eyes painlessly.
- [A melon baller emerges from the box and removes Fry's eyes. Fry screams]
Gamester 1: Oops! Sorry. I stepped on your foot.
Fry: It's okay. I'm fine.
Gamester 1: Let the animal abuse begin!
- [The giant donkey snarls at the contestants.]
Hattie: Alright, you monster whosit. I'm gonna stick this doohickey where the dealy don't whatsit.
- [The donkey scoops up Hattie with his mouth and swallows her.]
Bender: I'm sorry I called you a cheater, buddy.
Fry: [sniffles] Thanks, Bender. What do you say we team up and go out fighting?
Bender: I say, aw yeah, baby! Friends to the end!
- [Bender lets out a yell and charges at the beast. Fry also charges and ends up stabbing Bender's shiny metal ass.]
Bender: [yells] My vital ass organs! You are a cheater!
- [Bender keels over and falls over dead.]
Fry: Bender? Bender?!
Gamester 1: Congratulations, Philip J. Fry. You are the winner!
Gamester 3: Return his eyes that he might gaze upon the horror he has wrought! And the confetti.
- [Gamester 2 pushes the button. The confetti falls and Fry's eyes are restored. Fry falls to his knees and cries over his fallen best friend. Suddenly, the donkey roars and Hattie miraculously comes out of its mouth alive. She stabs Fry in the back with the tail and pins the tail on the donkey's rear.]
Hattie: Well, that's that. I gotta get to church.
Gamester 1: The games are now complete. The winner is… her. Whoever she is. We thank the players for their efforts.
- [The first Gamester pushes the button and suddenly, all the dead players descend from the ceiling alive. They all look around confused.]
Amy: How the shmeck are we alive?
Gamester 1: The machine can easily bring people back to life. Did I not mention that either?
Gamester 3: Farewell!
- [The Gamesters' platform disappears, as does Fry's house.]
Fry: Well, that was the second worst birthday party I ever had. All I ever wanted was for people to believe I'm not a cheater.
Leela: We believe you, Fry.
Bender: Yeah, seeing as how that old lady killed you so easy.
Hattie: He went down like a sack o' shoes.
Fry: I sure did. Thank you, everybody.
Bubblegum: Group hug. Come on! Group hug!
- [The entire group comes in for a group hug, with the exception of Vyolet, Gypsy-bot, Morris, Leg Mutant, and Leela's Grandmother.]
- [Flashback: The morning of the party. Yancy, Sr. is seen putting up the "Happy 8th Birthday!" banner in the dining room. Cut to the kitchen, where Mrs. Fry hides the baseballs.]
Yancy Fry, Sr.: Eh, you really think a games party is a good idea? I mean, Phil's not much of a competitor.
Mrs. Fry: Yeah, I know. He still can't work a zipper. But, he's my son, and I love him, and I wanna give him a birthday that'll leave him feeling like a winner for once.
- [Montage: To the music of "Ur Mum" by Wet Leg, we see what transpired throughout each of the games. Mrs. Fry poured some honey into Fry's Barrel of Primates. She also helped Fry blow out the last candle. During musical chairs, she used a mirror to time stopping the music to the exact point Philip was close to the chair. For the piñata, when Philip whacked at it, she cracked it open with a hammer. During the treasure hunt, she pitched the last baseball into the fridge when Phil wasn't looking. Finally, during Pin the Tail on the Donkey, she moved the rug with her foot until Philip was close to the donkey's bullseye. Cut to the end of the party. Young Fry sadly watches his friends angrily walk away from his window, sadly holding his trophy, as his mother proudly looks at him.]
- ["Ur Mum" continues over the Closing Credits.]
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