Transcript:The Prisoner of Benda


 * Linda: Tonight, at 11:00.
 * Morbo: Doom!
 * [Opening Credits: What happens in Stays in Cygnus X-1.]
 * [Scene: Planet Express, Lounge. Leela is looking at herself in a hand-held mirror.]
 * Leela: Boy, that thing's big. Fry, is my colossal eye too big?
 * [The rest of the crew is watching TV.]
 * Fry: No, it's what makes you you.
 * Leela: But it's so round, so hideously round.
 * Fry: Leela, listen. You're the most beautiful woman I've ever known.
 * Leela: Oh. So you only care about my looks?
 * Fry: No, I.... What?
 * Linda: [on TV.] Finally, New New York got a blast of class today as Nikolai, playboy ruler of the Robo-Hungarian Empire, arrived on his extravagant, -powered.
 * Nikolai: [on TV.] I'm just a humble emperor, with a big, big crown!
 * Bender: [He turns off the TV.] Of course I'm not planning to steal that crown!
 * Leela: What?
 * Bender: True. I've always dreamed of being an emperor. You know, for, and then forever. But heisting those jewels would be difficult.
 * Leela: You'd be stupid to try.
 * Bender: I'll need accomplices. A sexy vamp to distract and tie up the guard.
 * Amy: Never! [She walks away.]
 * Bender: A claw man to slip past the metal detector and cut the alarm wires.
 * Zoidberg Sorry, I'm set for life after that last job. [He takes an out of a bucket label "Aquariam Garbage" and wraps it around himself like a cravat.]
 * Bender: And finally, a chump, to be caught on video and later arrested.
 * Fry: As I told you on Sucker-Punch Day, I'm through being the chump.
 * Bender: Of course, it would all take split-second robotic timing. That's were I come in. You see, I own a watch. [He pulls out a .]
 * [Scene: Planet Express, The Professor workshop. Amy and Prof. Farnsworth are cleaning a machine.]
 * ’’’Farnsworth’’’: There. This time I'm sure I've fixed the mind switcher.
 * Amy: Good, I'm sick of cleaning up those heaps of dead monkeys. But why would you want your mind in a new body.
 * ’’’Farnsworth’’’: Well, as a man enters his 18th decade, he thinks back on the mistakes he's made in life.
 * Amy: Like the heaps of dead monkeys?
 * ’’’Farnsworth’’’: Science cannot move forward without heaps! No, what I regret is the youth I wasted playing it safe.
 * Amy: I wasted my youth porking out.
 * ’’’Farnsworth’’’: Yes, I remember. [He points to a picture of a fat Amy, captioned "2997 employee of the year".]
 * Amy: Would you please take that down? It's making me hungry.
 * ’’’Farnsworth’’’: Funny, I could use a extra meat on my bones. [He moves his coat and shows that he is just skin and bones.] Wait a second, if we switch bodies, I could live life to the extreme, and you could indulge your demonic food lust.
 * Amy: [She gasps.] We are just the people this mind switcher was made for by us! [They sit in the chairs.] Wait, can I still change my mind?
 * Farnsworth: Let's find out. [He pushes a button.]