Calculon

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Secondary character
Calculon
Calculon.jpg
Ageover 995
SpeciesRobot
Planet of originEarth
ProfessionActor, Director
First appearance"I, Roommate" (1ACV03)
Episode
Voiced byMaurice LaMarche

Calculon is an acting unit most famous as the star of the hit robot soap opera All My Circuits. He has also appeared in films, including The Magnificent Three, for which he was nominated for an Oscar at the 1074th Academy Awards.

Biography

Throughout his career, he has lived a secret life unknown to the public. Calculon claims to be 27 years old, but he is actually almost 1000 (2ACV18). He started his life humbly as a motorized service arm working on Project Satan. He later was presented with the opportunity to gain acting talent through a deal with the Robot Devil, who collected on that bargain in 3004 by asking Calculon to give up his ears (4ACV18). He made his way to being many of history's great acting robots, including Acting Unit 0.8, Thespa-mat, and David Duchovny. For most of these thousand years, he was also a Were-Car, until Fry and Leela broke the curse by destroying the original were-car.

At some point in his career he became acquainted with the works of Harold Zoid, whom he came to idolize (3ACV08). He was presented with the opportunity to work under Zoid's direction on The Magnificent Three, with the promise that he would win an Oscar for his work on the film. When he was not nominated, he threatened Dr. Zoidberg, Bender, and his idol Harold Zoid with death. Through Zoidberg's manipulation, he was nominated for Best Actor but ultimately lost to Zoid (again, through Zoidberg's manipulation).

In 3004, he was invited at the Late Night with Humorbot 5.0, where he met Coilette from Robonia, winner of five gold medals. He fell in love with her, not knowing she was actually Bender who changed his sex. They dated, and he asks Coilette to marry him. The wedding's day, Coilette faked his death, having suffered of African Hydraulic Fever. Calculon then starred in Coilette: A Calculon Story to honor his old love's memory (4ACV13).

He is a member of the League of Robots and, for a time, was it's leader. Under his leadership the organization remained lenient on it's official human-killing plank. After Bender joined in 3008, and was caught helping his human friends escape during Yivo's universe-wide mating (despite his frequent anti-human tirades), Calculon and the rest of the League mocked Bender (TBwaBB). Bender challenged Calculon to a duel and won, vaporizing Calculon's arm. Calculon resigned his leadership in the organization.

In 3010, he was directing a disaster film, but most of the props and the actors were presumably destroyed and killed in a real disaster in shooting the first scene (6ACV08).

Personality

Calculon is a skilled actor who is programmed to be very busy. He is idolized by many people, including Bender, and he can be extremely self-centered. Calculon's acting talent seems to have infused itself into his everyday life, and he speaks very melodramatically. He can also be driven to violence when he doesn't get his way, such as when he was not nominated for an Oscar after appearing in The Magnificent Three and threatened to murder Zoidberg, Zoid, and Bender. However, he is also incredibly gullible. He hired Bender as an actor on All My Circuits because believed "the audience" was rejecting the actors trying out for the show, when it was just Bender right outside the casting room yelling and disparaging everyone who came before him.

Character Description

Known Filmography

Additional Info

Trivia

  • He owns a big house in Hollywood.
  • He owns an enormous yacht named "Calculon's Talent" in the pool of which he sails a large yacht named "Calculon's Pride".
  • He enjoys hot showers.
  • He tends to see life as a huge soap opera.
  • Bender once worked as his hot water boiler in Hollywood. Bender was also his Official Stalker at one point.
  • He ran over Judge Whitey some time prior to The Beast with a Billion Backs, and was sentenced to community service.
  • He states explicitly in Into the Wild Green Yonder that his operating system is Windows Vista, and hence encounters an error in his programming seconds later.
    • This suggests that his OS has remained the same since his days as an assembly arm, which would date his assembly between 2007 and 2009 when Vista was the current Windows OS. Moreover as Project Satan is a military project and the US army switched to Vista in 2009 and Windows 7 is due out at the end of 2009, it is likely his assembly was in 2009 making his age 1005. Adding further confusion, in the television broadcast of Into the Wild Green Yonder the comment about Windows Vista was edited to say Windows 7.
  • Calculon is featured on a Pez dispenser that Bender once stole.

Quotes

    Robot Devil: Calculon, old friend, I'm afraid I need your ears.
    Calculon: Well I do owe you for giving me this unholy [melodramatically] acting talent!

    Calculon: Oh, how cruel and melodramatic fate is. [shouting] Why?

    Calculon: NOOOOOOOO!

    Coilette (Bender): But you always said you'd rather burn down a convent than give up show business.
    Calculon: I always said many things.

    Calculon: Honey unit, I'm home. [He gasps.] Monique!
    [Monique is in bed with Boxy. She pulls the sheets up around her.]
    Monique: Calculon!
    Boxy: [beep]
    Calculon: Oh, how I wish I could believe that. You may be my evil half-brother, but there's no law against murdering the other half.

    Calculon: That was so terrible, I think you gave me cancer! I don't care how popular you are, you will never work on my show!
    Fry: Yay, Bender!
    Leela: We demand Bender!
    Calculon: However, you've got the job.

    Calculon: Nay, I respect and admire Harold Zoid too much to beat him to death with his own Oscar.

    Monique: Calculon! But I thought you were.....
    Calculon: Egyptian?!

    Calculon: [thinking] I'd like to thank the Academy, my agent and most of all, my operating system, Windows Vista, for everything it-- [crashes] [mechanic voice] System error.

Appearances

References

  1. ^ YouTube - Robobium